{"id":501,"date":"2010-09-08T08:48:00","date_gmt":"2010-09-08T11:48:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/66.147.244.61\/~twisithe\/?p=501"},"modified":"2023-07-10T19:29:41","modified_gmt":"2023-07-10T22:29:41","slug":"quick-whats-my-name-mark-meer-on-sleepless-weekends-at-die-nastys-soap-a-thon","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.twisitheatreblog.com\/?p=501","title":{"rendered":"&quot;Quick! What&#8217;s My Name?&quot;: Mark Meer On Sleepless Weekends at Die-Nasty&#8217;s Soap-A-Thon"},"content":{"rendered":"<div align=\"justify\">\n<div class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/_T3kh_qPyRZY\/TIdQIBe5zPI\/AAAAAAAABDI\/Zm8WSaBISDU\/s1600\/mark+meer+collage+soap.jpg\" imageanchor=\"1\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" border=\"0\" height=\"252\" ox=\"true\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/_T3kh_qPyRZY\/TIdQIBe5zPI\/AAAAAAAABDI\/Zm8WSaBISDU\/s400\/mark+meer+collage+soap.jpg\" width=\"400\" \/><\/a><\/div>\n<div class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\">mark meer<\/div>\n<div class=\"separator\" style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><\/div>\n<p>This weekend is more exciting than Christmas for the stars of <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.casaannett.com\/varsconatheatre\/die-nasty\/Die-Nasty_Web\/Home.html\">Die-Nasty<\/a><\/em>, the Elizabeth Sterling Haynes Award and Canadian Comedy Award (2006)winning&nbsp;&nbsp;live improvised soap opera that has been running weekly in Edmonton since 1991. This weekend is <em>Die-Nasty\u2019s<\/em> annual fundraiser, <strong>The 18th Annual Soap-A-Thon<\/strong>, and it returns to the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.varsconatheatre.org\/index.html\">Varscona Theatre<\/a>, running CONTINULOUSLY from <strong>Friday, September 10th at 7pm until Sunday, September 12th at 9pm<\/strong>. One of the stars of <em>Die-Nasty<\/em>, and arguably the King of the Soap-A-Thon, <a href=\"http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/Mark_Meer\">Mark Meer<\/a>, who typically improvises for the entire duration of the Soap each year, was nice enough to answer a slew of questions I had about this incredible and magical theatrical event via email from Edmonton. <\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">Amanda Campbell (AC): I read that you attended a High School that didn\u2019t have a drama program and the closest you had come to acting by the time you started your BSC in University was playing Dungeons and Dragons, until you had the opportunity to be mentored by the members of <em>Three Dead Trolls in a Baggie<\/em>. How did that mentorship come about? What was it that first made you think, \u201cI\u2019d like to try Improv!\u201d? And when did you entirely abandon the Petri Dish in favour of zombies and international glamour girls? (the OBVIOUS choice)<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">Mark Meer (MM): I\u2019d be remiss if I didn\u2019t mention my early roles in elementary school Christmas pageants, but &#8211; yes, by junior high onwards, I really only had D&amp;D and other RPGs as any sort of creative outlet, acting-wise. I really wished that my high school had any kind of drama program, but studying one Shakespeare play a year in English class was as good as it got. However, my parents had season tickets to <a href=\"http:\/\/www.citadeltheatre.com\/\">the Citadel<\/a> since I was nine or ten, so I attended theatre regularly. When I moved to Edmonton to go to the U of A, I auditioned for a show at the Citadel&#8217;s Teen Festival of the Arts, and landed a part as a smarmy sportscaster in a show written and directed by Kent Staines called <em>Hero Bound<\/em>, loosely based on the Ben Johnson steroid scandal. That was when I actually decided that I wanted to be an actor, and pretty much stopped attending my university classes\u2026 though admittedly, my previous attendance had been sporadic, at best. <\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">The same year, I met the Trolls, and Wes Borg invited me to audition for a sketch comedy show they were directing at the \u201992 Teenfest. The show was directed by the Trolls, but written and performed by the teens they cast. They suggested improv as a good way to generate ideas for sketches, and referred us to Patti Stiles at <a href=\"http:\/\/www.rapidfiretheatre.com\/\">Rapid Fire Theatre<\/a>. Most of the rest of the cast had played Theatresports in high school, but I\u2019d never even heard of it (though I\u2019d always been a fan of <em>Monty Python, SCTV, Saturday Night Live<\/em>&#8230;). One workshop is all it took to hook me.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC:&nbsp;Do you remember the first character you played in your first Soap-A-Thon? And who was your first character in your first Season of <em>Die-Nasty<\/em>?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: The very first character I played in the original Soap-A-Thon back in 1993 was a drifter named Lon Wolf. I started my shift at 4AM. The costume was my street clothes, a trenchcoat and a toque. As I recall, he met a messy end after about ten hours, perishing in a knife-fight with a far more popular character, and I moved on to play someone else with a proper costume. After that, I guested several times in the \u201993-94 season as a South American cult leader named Pablo Don Carlos Vasquez Maria Conchita Alonso. My first regular season character as a core cast member was the always-potentially-evil Dr. E. He first appeared in the 1994 Soap-A-Thon and carried over into the \u201894-95 season.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">&#8230;Yes, I remember all the details\u2026 but then again, I can also tell you how much The Thing from the Fantastic Four can lift. I\u2019m a total continuity\/trivia nerd and a fan of minutiae. (FYI &#8211; The Thing, aka Ben Grimm, can lift\/press 85 tons).<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: (<em>I love that he knows this<\/em>). So, especially for readers in Toronto who are, I think generally, completely unfamiliar with the idea of an Improvised Soap Opera, and who may be fascinated, intrigued and perhaps even slightly incredulous at the connotation of people improvising continuously for 50+ hours, could you explain how the Soap-A-Thon typically is structured? There are obviously breaks for you to eat- and people come and go throughout the weekend&#8230; Also where does the food come from? <\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: We take a fifteen-minute intermission every two hours, for the sake of both the audience and cast. For me, that fifteen minutes is usually a frantic rush consisting of a bathroom visit, popping out into the alley for a cigarette, possibly changing clothes, and grabbing something to eat. Local restaurants sponsor the event with donations of food, so there\u2019s always fresh, healthy meals available for the actors, musicians, technicians, and directors. Our concession is also open around the clock. <\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">\u2026And I should mention that there have actually been some improv soaps in Toronto, peopled with such great performers as <strong>Albert Howell, Raoul Bhaneja, Peter Oldring, Pat Kelly<\/strong>, et al. And we\u2019ve welcomed some of Toronto\u2019s finest improvisers as guests at the Soap-A-Thon, including <strong>Kurt Smeaton, Carolyn Taylor, Rebecca Northan<\/strong>, and <strong>Caitlin Howden<\/strong>. This year, we have one of our alumni back for a visit \u2013 Mr. <strong>Ron Pederson<\/strong> of <em><a href=\"http:\/\/www.thenationaltheatreoftheworld.com\/\">Impromptu Splendor<\/a><\/em>. <\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: (<em>Good to know<\/em>!)&nbsp;There is obviously some forethought put into the Soap-a-Thon, as there is always a strong established theme- this year we know that you\u2019ll be improvising from within a wake for Orson Cain, &#8220;the grandest, most storied inventor and entrepreneur in the history of historic Edmonton-By-The-Sea.&#8221; Who comes up with the original premise prior to the Soap and how much discussion of the characters that will appear (and who will play them) is done beforehand? Do you typically bring costume pieces and random props with you that you think may come in handy for whatever the theme is?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: We try to decide organically, as a group\u2026 which means it takes forever &#8211; not because we disagree that much, but because there\u2019s over a dozen of us. But once we all manage to get together in a room, one idea usually sparks everybody\u2019s imagination, and quickly becomes the front-runner. Once we have the concept, we can roughly decide what types of characters we need to form the core of that setting, but those kinds of decisions are often made on the afternoon of the event. In the past, I\u2019ve brought two entire suitcases to the show, and some of those costumes never see the stage. Sometimes, the most beloved and hilarious characters are produced by grabbing a random wig and coat from the theatre\u2019s costume room during an intermission and asking the director \u201cWhat\u2019s my name?\u201d<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: The Improvised Soap Opera is directed by veteran Improv hero Dana Andersen, can you explain his role in shaping the weekend\u2019s machinations? How can Improv be \u201cdirected\u201d?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: Essentially, Dana \u201ccalls\u201d the scene over the microphone, so the improvisers and the audience hear it at the same time. He\u2019ll set up the location, who is present, and the situation at the top of the scene. Then we run with it. Dana then keeps track of what plotlines develop from the subsequent action, and lets that inform his future calls regarding those characters.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: Apart from being a compact entity and show unto itself, is the structure for the Soap-A-Thon very different from the weekly <em>Die-Nasty<\/em> shows?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: It\u2019s basically an entire season of <em>Die-Nasty<\/em> compressed into one weekend, with extreme sleep deprivation thrown into the mix. Because of its nature, the Soap-A-Thon is also usually set at some sort of event that would bring a large group of people together for a weekend.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: You achieved sort of mythic stature in 1995 by being the first in the <em>Die Nasty<\/em> troupe to \u201cgo the distance\u201d and improvise for the full duration of the Soap-A-Thon, and I read that by January of this year, you had improvised for over 50 hours sixteen times. (Amazing!) In 1995, did you set that as a challenge for yourself, or did you just get caught up in the fun of it and not want to leave?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: Yes, this will be my seventeenth time all the way through, counting the shows we\u2019ve done in England. I certainly wanted to go the distance at the second Soap-A-Thon in 1994, but Ian, our director at the time, benched me for a six hour nap on the Sunday morning. He was honestly worried I might do myself physical damage, and wanted me fresh for the final shifts that night. The following year, I convinced him that I could do it\u2026 and so I did. Once others saw it could be done, they tried it, with Dana Andersen and Patti Stiles being the first to join me in the 50+Hour Club. Now I think there\u2019s at least twenty people on both sides of the Atlantic who\u2019ve completed the entire thing\u2026<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: It is an exceptionally impressive feat to improvise for over two days straight- I have heard that sleep deprivation can be marvellously freeing for improvisers because exhaustion and adrenaline are both very conducive for eliminating the self-censor that performers often battle against and can make for a more primal, or instinctual performance. Practically though, improvising aside, it is really difficult (obviously) for the body to go for that long without sleep. Do you have a process that you do in the days before the Soap starts to prepare yourself for the Improv marathon? Or is it just a lot of coffee and energy drinks?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: The first time I did it, it was like being on acid. Seriously. I hallucinated a fair amount, had uncontrollable laughing fits, odd mood swings\u2026 As I\u2019ve \u201cgone the distance\u201d year after year, these symptoms have fallen away. I still get tired, but I don\u2019t really reach that state of utter euphoria and madness that I did the first four or five times. I sort of miss it. I compared notes with Patti Stiles, who\u2019s also completed multiple Soap-A-Thons, and she\u2019s had the same experience. Patti swears by no caffeine at all, just water and juice. I tend to have a cup of coffee when I normally would during the day, but it\u2019s a real mistake to rely on it to keep you awake \u2013 you WILL crash. I limit myself to one Red Bull a day, drink plenty of water, and try to sleep in the day before the show. The night after, I\u2019ll usually sleep for at least twelve hours.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: I heard that there is a \u201cbig book\u201d where remembrances are written down by the performers after the Soap-A-Thon has ended, which presumably is meant to capture a bit of that particular experience for posterity. Do you ever video tape the Soaps or do you think that Improv loses most of its magic outside of its own particular moment in time? <\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: Well, past Soap-A-Thons have been taped, but the real problem is finding another 50 hours to sit down and watch it all\u2026 and of course, nearly ANY theatrical performance is a different experience on archival video.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: I read that your alter-ego <a href=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/?ref=logo#!\/profile.php?id=689730717&amp;ref=ts\">Susanna Patchouli<\/a>, who has been the host of the Improvised Variety\/Talk Show <em>Oh Susanna!<\/em> since 1999, was born out of <em>Die Nasty<\/em> and a Veronica (as in <em>Betty and Veronica<\/em>) costume. Has Susanna ever reappeared in the Soaps or do you revel in the opportunity to create new characters?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: I do enjoy creating new characters, but I\u2019m a real fan of bringing back old favourites for a visit. Susanna Patchouli has showed up in both the regular season and the Soap-A-Thon, but as a character that requires over an hour in the make-up chair, her utility is somewhat limited. On the other hand, I\u2019m always bringing back my other characters like children\u2019s performer The Dancing Man, doctor of journalism Fisher T. Johnson, the Robert DeNiro-esque Jerry Cashola, and others, but usually just for a shift or two. Lately, I\u2019ve been sticking to one character for the whole thing. For example, I played the ghoulish Timburton Hemlocke for the entirety of the 50-hour London Improvathon in January, and last Soap-A-Thon (set at a high school reunion), I just played the principal, Principal Character, except for a brief four-hour stint as comedian Gilbert Gottfried. <\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: Since emerging into Edmonton\u2019s theatre scene in 1992, you have become one of the city\u2019s most iconic and beloved improvisers, and you also act in plays. Improv and Improvisers are a vibrant and vital aspect of the Edmontonian theatre community, with a rich tradition, where most performers seem to permeate fluidly between doing plays, Improvising and also doing sketch comedy. Things in Toronto are far more segregated. Can you talk a little bit about the benefits of this fluidity for the performers and for the community as a whole? How much do the audiences overlap? Would most of the audience for something like <em>Oh Susanna<\/em> or <em>Die Nasty<\/em> be the same one that would attend plays at the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.fringetheatreadventures.ca\/\">Fringe Festival<\/a>? Do you think there is a conglomeration of people who frequent the Citadel Theatre who are also moonlighting Die Hards? Or does the theatre audience there tend to be more split?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: Well, I blush to hear adjectives like &#8220;beloved&#8221; and &#8220;iconic&#8221; applied to me, but thank-you. I think one of the great things about the Edmonton theatre community is the high level of cross-pollination between artistic forms &#8211; not just between theatre and improv, but also sketch, stand-up, even music and dance. We&#8217;re very lucky here. Visiting performers always seem to comment on and marvel at it. It fosters a spirit of co-operation and community. In fact, one of the founding principles of the Varscona\u2019s variety shows, both <em>Oh Susanna!<\/em> and the <em>Johnny and Poki Variety Hour<\/em> before it, has always been bringing artists together.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">I haven\u2019t done any surveys or comprehensive audience break-downs, but I\u2019d say that each of the regular improv shows (<em>Die-Nasty, Oh Susanna!,<\/em> <em>Theatresports, <a href=\"http:\/\/www.rapidfiretheatre.com\/shows\/chimprov\/\">Chimprov<\/a><\/em>) has its own distinct audience, with a bit of overlap between each. Edmonton does have some very dedicated theatre fans that seem to see EVERYTHING. If someone enjoys improv, they\u2019re likely to see many of the shows, but its also likely that they\u2019ll have a favourite that they\u2019ll attend every performance of, and others that they catch when they can. The same applies to other theatre, I think. There are some people who only go to shows at the Fringe, some who only subscribe to one company&#8217;s season &#8211; but there are many who try to see as much as they can.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: <em>Die Nasty<\/em> has an alliance with Improv troupes in England and three British Improvisers are coming to join the Soap-A-Thon this year, and I know that members of <em>Die-Nasty<\/em> have also gone to England to join the Improvathon they do there. How did this collaboration come about?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: The late, great British theatre icon\/guru Ken Campbell attended a <em>Die-Nasty<\/em> performance in 2001 when he was in town performing <em>The History of Comedy, Part One: Ventriloquism<\/em>. He loved the show, and came out to the bar with us afterwards. I was sitting next to him, and the Soap-A-Thon came up in conversation, as it often does with me. (I\u2019m obsessed, I admit it \u2013 it\u2019s one of my favourite things to do as a performer.) Ken was the man famously responsible for the 24-hour play <em>The Warp<\/em>, so this piqued his interest. In 2005, he secured a grant to send his pupil and colleague Sean McCann over to Canada for the Soap-A-Thon to participate, observe and report on what he found, and the rest just fell into place. Dana Andersen and Davina Stewart went to England for the first London Improvathon, which I think lasted 36 hours. Since then, Dana, Davina, my wife Belinda (Cornish)&nbsp;and I (and several other <em>Die-Nasty<\/em> members) have made regular trips to England for their 50-hour show, and at least three or four Brits have always come here for ours. This year, we\u2019re welcoming theatre royalty Alan Cox (one of the stars of <em>Young Sherlock Holmes<\/em> and the impossibly-talented son of the renowned Brian Cox), along with Adam Meggido and the lovely Ruth Bratt of <em>The Sticking Place<\/em> and <em>Showstopper: The Improvised Musical<\/em>. Adam\u2019s currently responsible for the organization of the London show &#8211; it\u2019s always nice to be able to play host to him, since he takes such good care of us.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: <em>Die Nasty<\/em> has travelled not only to England, but also to Los Angeles, where Joe Flaherty started his own Soap <em>The Soap Also Rises<\/em>, so I was wondering, now that Ron Pederson (with Matt Baram and Naomi Snieckus), is valiantly thrusting improvisation into the theatrical world of Toronto, and especially since he returns to <em>Die Nasty<\/em> whenever he\u2019s home in Edmonton&#8211; can we in Toronto dare to dream of a day that you guys will come visit and play with us? Or do we have to rent a bus to Edmonton?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: As I said, there have been improv soaps in Toronto before, and I certainly hope there will be again\u2026 because I want to come play in them! I had the opportunity to appear in the entire run of Joe\u2019s most recent soap at Second City L.A. in 2008 \u2013 it was a blast.<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">AC: (<strong><em>I hope so too!!)<\/em><\/strong> Lastly, what is one thing that you are really excited for specifically in this upcoming Soap-A-Thon?<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">MM: Aforementioned Toronto improv genius Kurt Smeaton is unable to attend this year, due to the recent birth of his first child. He\u2019s requested that, in his honour, I play a character named \u201cDick Ballsenshaft\u201d, and I\u2019ve taken him up on it. I can\u2019t wait to find out exactly who this guy IS&#8230;<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">I\u2019m sure the Die-Hards wait with bated breath!<\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\"><\/div>\n<div align=\"justify\">This year the Soap-a-Thon cast includes: <strong>Mark Meer, Cathleen Rootsaert, Donovan Workun, Belinda Cornish, Davina Stewart, Stephanie Wolfe, Peter Brown, Matt Alden, Jeff Haslam, Leona Brausen, Sheri Somerville, Kory Mathewson and Tom Edwards<\/strong>, joined by the United Kingdom&#8217;s own <strong>Alan Cox<\/strong>, London&#8217;s <em>Showstopper<\/em> stars <strong>Ruth Bratt<\/strong> and <strong>Adam Meggido<\/strong>, <strong>Rosie Wilkinson<\/strong> of Liverpool&#8217;s Impropriety, National Theatre of the World founder and Die-Nasty life-partner <strong>Ron Pederson<\/strong>, DN Day-One-Dame <strong>Kirsten Van Ritzen<\/strong>, as well as a whole bloodline&#8217;s worth of Edmonton&#8217;s best and bravest cousins, kinsfolk &amp; kindred connections.&nbsp;The cast&nbsp;also welcome back beloved founding DN member and 50+hour Soap-A-Thon veteran, International Improv Matriarch <strong>Patti Stiles<\/strong>! Edmonton-By-The-Sea&#8217;s mayor and long-loved eulogist is Grandpa <strong>Dana Andersen<\/strong>. Providing songs of inspiration is Brother <strong>Paul Morgan Donald<\/strong> with Uncle <strong>Jan &#8220;Chips&#8221; Randall<\/strong> and&nbsp;their Improvising Technical Wizard and Master Embalmer is Cousin <strong>Brad Fischer<\/strong>.<\/div>\n<p><\/p>\n<div style=\"text-align: justify;\"><strong>The 18th Annual Die-Nasty Soap-A-Thon plays&nbsp;CONTINULOUSLY from Friday, September 10th at 7pm until Sunday, September 12th at 9pm at the Varscona Theatre (10329-83rd Avenue, Edmonton, Alberta).&nbsp;Single admission tickets (no re-entry permitted) for the event are $15 during prime-time (7pm-1 am) and $12 at all other times of the day and night. Audience members also have the option of purchasing a weekend pass for $40, which lets you come and go freely throughout the entire Soap-A-Thon. All tickets &amp; passes go on sale at 5pm Friday, September 10 at the VarsconaTheatre box office (10329-83 Avenue) and are available all weekend long! All ticket sales are CASH ONLY. If you&#8217;re in Edmonton this weekend, this is where you ought to be. Stay awake for the wake. <\/strong><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>mark meer This weekend is more exciting than Christmas for<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4672],"tags":[4300,4301,3246,4304,6338,4308],"class_list":["post-501","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-interview","tag-die-nasty","tag-edmonton","tag-improv","tag-mark-meer","tag-soap-a-thon","tag-varscona-theatre"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.2 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>&quot;Quick! 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